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Monday, 18 September 2017

Berlin Marathon: one week left


It's that time again. After almost a whole year (how fast the time passes) my second marathon is almost there. On October 2nd 2016 was one of the most beautiful and most instructive days of my life. I've learned that I can achieve anything when I try hard and never give up. I was so happy that I did not give up. I havn't walked at the marathon. I enjoyed the first 28 kilometers and then fought mentally. Physically I was fit. But every runner knows that the head is the biggest enemy it is to defeat.

Now I'm sitting here. The next marathon is only six days away and there are many signs against a great run. It probably is going to rain. The marathon also takes place on the same day as the Bundestagswahl. That is why there are over fifty pedestrian crossings that are likely to cause runners to collide with pedestrians. Runners are disturbed, maybe fall, get injured, and so on. These are the worst-case scenarios. Positive thinking is difficult in times like this. Right now my head is painting all the negative possibilities.

For these reasons, I gave up my time goal. I also run in a wrong starting block, with all runners who wants to finish over 4:15 hours the marathon as well as all who have never run a marathon. So I have to overtake many people.

I can only hope for the best. Perhaps I read this in 7 days and everything went well. I dont know. There has never been a comparable situation, which is why I do not know how it turns out on Sunday. The runners can be stopped badly and the pedestrians lose their patience at some point and just go over it and think "That will be alright!". But then a runner hits them and of course the runners have to run besides the pedastrian, lose time and if this happens more often in the race it can also really annoy the runnery.

At the moment, however, I think the City Berlin don't really care about the runners. It is about the election and the marathon. The organizers of the marathon are forced to set up these pedestrian crossings. The government has refused to postpone the election. I also do not know why they would not hold the election on another day in firtst play For the present one very likely also leads to fewer people choosing to vote. I do not know who made this decision.

I can not change the situation. I must learn to accept situations that I can not influence and make the most of them. Smile. Wait what happens. I hope that everything goes well and everything is well planned. Do not allow me to be influenced by something happening.

I paid a lot of money for the Berlin Marathon. I would like to reach my goal to run a marathon under 4:30 hours. I hope that the circumstances do not destroy my goal. The speed should not be the problem, my fitness is good. I hope that my head, my fears and my doubts will not stand in my way.

I'll try to believe in myself the next few days. To accept the situation and make the best of it. If this situation destroys the marathon for me - and many others - then simply shake it off. I hope that a time between 4:20 to 4:29 hours is possible. Despite the conditions. I will do my best. I have a plan on how fast I need to run to reach my goal time. Even if I run one kilometer longer, I should make it.

I just have to say to myself that the organization of this event cannot destroy this day. I have paid so much money. I've trained so much. I'm going to smile. I will do my best. And no matter how this is going to turn out, I'm going be happy, proud and going to enjoy the day. Even in the rain, even after ten clashes with strangers, who illegally crossed the track. I am concerned about recklessness and lack of ability to organize a marathon and a choice.

I hope that I read this entry next week and that I will be proud with my medal in hand and a time under 4 hours 30 minutes. I will do my best. I am going to be strong. Happy. Grateful.

I have six day left to get rid of my anxiety and the panic.

Just run. Don't think about it. Just run. Run your pace.

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